Posted by: fullandbye | November 24, 2005


People call me crazy. They might be right.

But after spending thanksgiving with a woman who has really advanced alzheimer’s, I am SO THANKFUL for my presence of mind.

Does anyone know anything about living wills? I really want to arrange to die with dignity, while still myself. The thought of slowly losing touch with reality frightens me more than death itself. Give me hemlock, but only after I repay to Asclepius the cock that I owe him.

Also, I had the weirdest and most hilarious dream last night. I had many bizarre dreams, but this one stands out.

In this dream I was invited to attend a party in honor of Matan getting back the scores on some career aptitude test he had taken. I arrived at the party (unknown outdoor location, perhaps Magnuson Park) to find the party in some degree of chaos. One of my father’s coworker’s daughter (in real life she is my age) was also celebrating her test results. As it turned out, she had scored really well, almost all 9’s out of 10 in all categories. Matan had not done so well.

The scores for this exam were printed on the plastic wrapping of frozen turkeys, and were presented in a format not unlike nutrition information tables. Matan was furiously drop kicking his turkey, only to pick it up and throw it down, then kick it again, then pick it up again etc. I climbed a tree, and from this vantage point I watched his ridiculous behavior for some time, before finally jumping down and wrestling the turkey from him. Some of the categories he had scored well in, but in some others he had done quite poorly. I took a closer look at the categories, and they revealed themselves to be the most ridiculous test categories ever. He had scored 2 of 10 in both “putting things on top of other things” and “opening cans in creative ways”. After I burst out laughing, he continued to kick and punch his turkey, and I woke up laughing myself silly.


  1. Does anyone know anything about living wills? I really want to arrange to die with dignity, while still myself.
    You’ll need an estate lawyer to draw up some papers for you. This isn’t too terribly hard and isn’t very expensive. The real trick is your family members. It’s very important that your family members are aware of your wishes and support them fully. A family member can either hold up or change your final wishes even in the presence of a living will. And as we saw in the Schiavo case it’s important that all of your family members agree.

  2. that is the best remembered dream ever.
    I might go stamp that category on a turkey with cranberry sauce now…

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